Finding music in my life

Today's post is in participation with Women On Writing's mass-blogging event, Everybody is Talking About Finding the Music in Life. We are celebrating the release of Sonia's Song by Sonia Korn-Grimani. To read Sonia's post and follow our symphony of participating bloggers visit The Muffin. Share your comments on any participating blog for a chance to win a copy of Sonia's Song! One reader will also win! I will send in the name of one commenting visitor to be entered into the WOW drawing for a copy of Sonia's Song in either print or ebook (winner's choice), and from those entries one winner will be chosen at random. (The contest is open until 11:59 pm Thursday, October 18th I will send in my randomly chosen reader's entry by noontime Friday, October 19th (Mountain Time) My jazzman. That he was. I couldn't do this topic justice without writing about my son Paul and his music. We lost him to suicide in 1999 as a result of his bipolar disorder. Very early, from the time … [Read more...]

Writing down the memories

It was almost an obsession of mine to get my Paul memories written down. I even wrote poems and journal entries about how I went about it. And fortunately I did write them down because a lot of that material ended up in my memoir, Leaving the Hall Light On. Memory List I'm making a memory list. I don't want to forget my son Paul, So I'm writing down all the things I can think of that were unique to him. I keep grabbing, scratching my bony claws at the surface of my brain to remember, to rediscover, to reconnect with how he looked, what he said, what he did, how he did it. I am continually searching for little mannerisms that were so Paul. I keep adding to it I keep going back to it I keep rereading it I keep editing it, so I don't duplicate what's already on it. But, hey, I know a little list of things he did or said isn't going to bring him back to me. That's the truth. You should have seen him. He walked so fast like the rest of the New Yorkers. I … [Read more...]

New York City Memories with Paul

Paul, June 1992, New York City In June 1992 I went to New York City to visit Paul. We shopped for a bookcase for his new studio apartment that he kept immaculate, we had dinner at a favorite Indian restaurant, and we went to the theater. One day it was so hot that I took a shower at his place before we went to dinner and my first meeting with his new girlfriend. This was the young woman who was his love for the rest of his life. He was very caring of me during this visit. He stayed with me at the Union Station until it was time for me to board the train for Washington DC where I would also visit my brother and his family. Paul worried about me being in the station alone. I am so glad we had such a special time together, and that he gave me the opportunity to take his picture. That visit took place nine months before his first manic episode. After that there were no more opportunities. Paul's New York New York City Union Square, the lower East side Paul's country. He … [Read more...]